Today was crazy. Chase woke up at 5:30 and couldn't go back to sleep. I live in a studio apt, so there isn't another room he can go into so that I can sleep in quiet. Needless to say, what my brilliant bofriend does is sit next to me on the bed and poke me until I smack him. After seeing that this doesn't work he pulls the covers off of me and fights with me until he's sure I won't be able to fall back asleep. Nice. Anyway, he told me he fixed all the clocks (daylight savings) and that he is planning on leaving my house at 10:00 to go to Jersey and pick up his daughter.
It's so weird to think that he's going to be in Cali after Christmas for 6 months. I'm so afarid I'll never see him again. Or that I will and we won't be the same people anymore. I made him pancakes for breakfast. I've been making pancakes alot lately. I think I become Susie Homemake when I make pancakes. I like that feeling and I don't want to lose it. Last week I made pumpkin muffins and cookies for Claire (his daughter) and his family. Tomorrow I am suppose to go over there and carve the pumpkin with them. I just don't know how much closer I should allow myself to get to them because he's leaving. It's not fair to his daughter, and it isn't fair to me. Chase and I talk don't really discuss what's going to happen to us when he leaves. We imply that we're going to stay together, but I'm not sure it's realistic.
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